Category: Thailand

  • “I Wish Your Dad Was a Fisherman”

    “I Wish Your Dad Was a Fisherman”

    This is what my dad affectionately tells Mum quite often (much to her annoyance) and probably has done since they met. “If your dad was a fisherman we would be spending two weeks in a fishermen’s village with the white beaches and the sunshine, and not with the mosquitoes.” When it comes to organising our trips to Thailand especially, as much as he loves the quirks and realness of rice-farm country life, the amazing landscape it inhibits; and it really is something to behold – the beaches of Siam possess a beauty that is simply incomparable.

    Kim and I had never been this far south in Thailand before, but for Mum and Dad, it marked a glorious comeback; a return after thirty years. Whilst Dad likes to wind Mum up for not being the daughter of a fisherman, she in turn is partial to reminding him of their TWO anniversaries they must celebrate every year (one for their traditional Thai wedding, the other for the British registry); obviously expecting twice as many gifts/meals out/flowers as is customary.

    Golden Oldies
    Golden Oldies

    This trip was therefore a little more significant for our family than the times before, since The Rents were celebrating their anniversary (or should I say one of them) at the very beach they shared their honeymoon 30 years ago, and even though they are, and will remain to be as corny as ever, their paradise hideaway is a tad different than before to say the least.

    Google Phuket and you will find a vast catalogue of images portraying a coast that is so perfect and of untouched beauty that you could ever have imagined. The trouble is the amount of people who have done just that. Tourism in the area is booming, even after the tragedy that was the tsunami of 2004, Thailand maintains its industry in the south very well, to the point that the place has become spoilt a little. I don’t mean to sound negative or in any way ungrateful; Phuket is spectacular, and Kata beach, where we stayed, is still one to rival others – the only thing is that so many people have succumbed to its allure, and because of this it has become tainted somewhat. In actual fact, before arriving at our destination, Dad had read online that only recently, action had been taken to remove makeshift bars, parasols and deckchairs from Kata beach; so it had been even more inundated with tourists before we had even arrived. The intake of visitors from across the globe has created a good, reputable name for the south of Thailand, and through this, the rest of the country, which is great, but seeing the slight disappointment in Mum and Dad’s eyes on reminiscing prompted me to question what the now-booming destination was like in times gone by.

     

    ‘It’s changed so much.’

    It was a little sad to see, and in all honesty, it made me miss Hua Hin, where we lived for a short while; it was becoming a little touristy, but not on the same level as Phuket, that it had changed completely.

    Saying this, if you look close enough (or follow your stomach), you will find portals into the past; hidden gems in Phuket which took Mum and Dad straight back to their heyday. Two days into our seaside holiday, we came across The Kitchen Restaurant, which pretty much became home for the rest of our stay. Everything about this place is authentic, and to be honest, it started to feel more like eating with family than dining out; the cocktails were superb, the food even better (THEY HAD MANGO AND STICKY RICE AND THIS MEANS EVERYTHING) and the establishment itself is open air; the original Thai Kitchen. The atmosphere created by bamboo walls and a tin/thatched roof combined with the 80’s ex-pat playlist made for many an enjoyable evening. When Carabao’s ‘Made in Thailand’ played I thought the Rents were going to cry.

    Apart from the excellent menu and outstanding hospitality, the Kitchen Restaurant offers cooking classes and tours, and even taxis guests to and from the restaurant provided they are staying within the local vicinity. I can’t express how grateful we were to the restaurant for not making us climb that damned hill to the hotel. #SAVED

    My dad, being a bloke, made sure we looked for the nearest waterhole while strolling about on holiday. As we ambled through the town in 40 degrees (40 DEGREES, PEOPLE!), we stumbled upon a bar that emitted the same kind of vibes The Kitchen had; back to the old school, hippy, travellers-and-Thais-coming-together type atmosphere. There was bamboo on the walls, foreign coin within the tables and a man on a stool with an acoustic guitar.

     

    Even though it has changed enormously by the sounds of it, Phuket still has its charm, and we all enjoyed our break by the beach (I think Mum was very content with being treated to many dinners out). Although super cringe, I loved seeing the Rents in their element, and because of this, part of me really wishes I could have seen them together at the time when the places I’ve mentioned were not hidden treasures on the island, but instead made up the majority of it.

    Honeymoon Couple
    Honeymoon Couple
  • This Must Be What Being Beyoncé Feels Like

    This Must Be What Being Beyoncé Feels Like

    Mission complete. We had done our Die Hard bit and survived village life in the rural Thai countryside, without getting completely eaten alive by mosquitoes or becoming emotional wrecks. I had managed to fight back the tears when it came to saying goodbye and leaving Nakhon Ratchasima for Bangkok. The bus station was a hot mess of deafening vendors and lairy travellers, all trying to get everywhere at once – it was a frenzy of last minute commotion and suitcase obstacles; in the end all I wanted was to get on that damned (air-conditioned) bus.

    Our family trips to Thailand involve more travelling than the average get-away – we usually spend a few nights in Bangkok first, before two weeks up-country, then a week at the seaside before returning to the capital. On previous occasions we’ve stayed in Jomtien, Hua Hin and Bangsaphan, each home to beaches I’ve marvelled at and never wanted to leave. This time round on Family Vaycay Siam Edition 2K14, Dad decided Kim and I needed to see what the real deal was, so we found ourselves Phuket-bound.

    We were flying to the South, so The Rents had booked one night in the Amari hotel in Bangkok, next to Don Meuang airport. The beds were huge, the shower was SHAMAYZING and I rather enjoyed strutting around in a hotel robe and slippers, being the flawless diva I am.

    Comfort

    The next day we were up and ready to go, on more-than-full stomachs thanks to gluttony plus an all-you-can-eat breakfast buffet. The flight to Phuket was short and sweet (we received more complimentary snacks on the Korat-Bangkok bus-ride), and on arrival we found the airport unofficially extended beyond its doors; crowds of taxi and tour company representatives gathered close enough to the airport entrance that we literally got named placards shoved in our faces. Through the mass we spotted our transfer, and so began the hour taxi ride (in a plush 4×4, WAHEY) to our (five star) hotel. Pulling up to the Avista Resort in Kata, Phuket, left me a bit gormless to say the least. You know how you have those places you stay in, and even though it’s great, and it’s a lovely treat being away from home, but there’s still some things that could be changed/made better/’well it’s just not quite home is it?’. Yeah, well, this place is different, as in I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE WHERE DO I SIGN UP FOR PERMANENT RESIDENCE. It’s absolute perfection. I cannot fault it. Believe me, I’ve tried to think of ways it falters, but this hotel is not lacking in any department. The only thing I can say is to get there from the beach/town you will have to endure climbing an almighty hill; but then it only costs 2 bob in a taxi to get up it, so… no complaints from me.

    Kim and I were so impressed with our living-the-life-of-luxury room that we did the classic ERMEHGERD LET’S TAKE PHOTOS OF EVERYTHING routine, so here you go:

    DAT SHOWER DOE. I enjoyed the dream acoustics so much: It’s like I was transformed into Sasha Fierce, okay? My sister on the other hand not so much, but I reckon it’s cause she was dying  for a pee whilst I happened to be mid-ballad.

    Breakfast was sensational. Think the kind of buffet you see in dreams: there was toast, Danish pastries,  croissants, waffles, pancakes, every kind of jam, salad, fruit, porridge, cereal, bacon, sausages,  noodles, fried rice, chicken/beef/pork/fish stir-fry: literally you name it, they had it. They even had an Egg-Man; as in,  you ask him how you want them done and he’ll do it – even a personally made omelette. Insane.

    The first meal of the day probably isn’t supposed to last two hours, but when mother wants to make the most of an inclusive breakfast buffet, be prepared to sit through four bowlfuls of Guay Tiaw Naam.

    Ladies that lounge
    Ladies that lounge
  • SnapStory: Can We Please Just Take a Minute To Appreciate How Cool This Guy Is

    SnapStory: Can We Please Just Take a Minute To Appreciate How Cool This Guy Is

    • Rice Farmer
    • Construction Worker
    • Coconut Cutter
    • Personal Taxi man
    • Banana Grower;
    • First and foremost, Family man.

    I’ve never seen him angry, and I’ve never seen a man with so much patience for how big his family is. He is never out of things to do but always has time for others. He has never been to the dentist in his life, and yet holds a full set of white teeth and a winning smile. We know him as Granddad, our classy Khun Da.

  • 1. I’m an Eighth Chinese

    1. I’m an Eighth Chinese

    1. Thailand is known for being home to Southeast Asia’s wildest beasts and most curious creepy crawlies, but nothing will instigate more the sensation of utter terror than the sight of a lingering mosquito (take it from me, Dengue fever ain’t all that fun).
    1. It doesn’t matter how OTT the acting is (at times abysmal), how out of sync the background music is, or even how many adverts there are, you will somehow find yourself shedding a tear over what has become your favourite Thai lakorn drama, because THEY JUST DON’T REALISE THEY BELONG TOGETHER FOREVER AND IT’S SO DAMN FRUSTRATING!

    1. Everyone is related – going to market with Mum involved constantly stopping to say hello to relatives I didn’t even know I had, e.g. “This is your Grandad’s second cousin’s brother-in-law”.
    1. On the subject of market, I have never felt so white in my life.
    1. It is possible to sweat as soon as you step out of the shower, or in my case, the washroom equipped with bowl and bucket of water – that’s right, they do it old skool here, a la ‘splash’n’dash’.
    1. Sitting in the back of a pick-up truck is the most fun ever, until the heavens decide to open up – when it rains, it pours… so much so that the road becomes invisible; gotta love monsoon season!
    1. Tiger Balm is a remedy that cures everything – bruises, mosquito bites, broken heart, you name it!
    1. Apparently (Grandma says) 200 Baht, the equivalent of £4, is too expensive for a hand-cart of coconuts (40 to be precise!).
    2. Rice is life. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and even dessert! The word for dinner/meal in Thai actually translates ‘eat rice’  – true story.

    These are only a few things I have learnt from this trip and previous visits to Mum’s village (particularly the first one, Grandma just came out with it; apparently her dad was from China and died from smoking too much opium). This is not a holiday. My dad jokes that when we come back from ‘up-country’, Ban Wat, Nakhon Ratchasima, to be exact, it’s as if we’ve returned from a mission like in one of those Bruce Willis films. What he means by this is, the two weeks that we spend here in the village on every trip we make to Thailand, this is the hardest part, in so many ways. For one thing everything is so different, so raw. It’s not a bad thing, at all; in fact it is quite refreshing to experience living this way. I think things are appreciated more as a result. I will give examples: the kitchen in my grandparents’ house is not actually in the house. It is an outdoor shelter of tin sheets under which there are wooden tables and seats. The bed is a hard mattress on the floor, the cooker is an Asian barbecue and the sink is a hose and a giant plastic tub. This all sounds quite basic, but it works, and why shouldn’t it? The only pain is that everything cooked must be done there and then, but if it produces the freshest food, then is that really so terrible?

    It is always inspiring to see Mum back in the place where she grew up, and she truly is in her element, running around cooking for everyone, strutting about in a sarong and flip flops, speaking (yelling) in her Korat dialect ever so sassily. Yet at the same time, you can see how it is so difficult for her to come back, because of how taxing it was before. I think subconsciously she goes back to her role of caring for everyone, as in back when she was 14, having left school to work with her dad constructing roads, and to later help her mum look after 6 siblings. Accustomed to the ways of Western life now, I can see the frustration Mum faces; also having to play translator for two weeks can’t be a doddle, “MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM what are they saying to me?!”.

    Sassy Country Girl
    Sassy Country Girl

    Every time we move on from Ban Wat it is nice to see Mum. I say this because although we are staying in the same house and visiting the same places, we see her only in passing, or when she has the time to sit down after rushing around trying to see everyone.   This brings me onto the main reason why our ‘mission’ is so tough. We try to go to Thailand every three years, at one point we had to leave it six years because of political unrest in the country. This gives Mum two weeks for every three years to see the majority of her family. From day one there is a countdown on the time she has, and as soon as we step off of the bus from Bangkok it settles in that there are only 14 days to enjoy village life. For Mum this means 14 days to see everyone she can, and spend as much time catching up as she can. Sometimes, it doesn’t happen, which just makes this flying visit all the more heartbreaking. When I was nine I remember crying in Granddad’s truck on the way to the bus station, because I had left my watch at their house. The watch was just an excuse to come back; I really wasn’t ready to leave, and this is the feeling I’m dreading when the day comes this time round.

    Welcome to Wild Country
    Welcome to Wild Country
  • Krung Thep Has Us Now

    Krung Thep Has Us Now

    I’ve never cried after leaving a place as much as here.  I don’t think that will change.

    Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Ayuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniwet Mahasathan Amon Piman Awatan Sathit Sakkathattiya Witsanukam Prasit , best known as Bangkok to you, me, and the rest of the world, is not some seedy Asian capital (with a ridiculously long name may I add); for me it represents so much more. It is the gateway between my two cultures, where West meets East, an extraordinary metropolis where you could feed an elephant, buy a fake Rolex and sit in the back of a rickshaw, all on the same street.

    This place makes no sense. Translated as ‘City of Angels’, Krung Thep to me, is a prime example of Crazy Town. Stepping out of the airport we were hit with the full-force of the city’s humidity; the air is literally so thick and hot, it is hard to breathe (I don’t suppose pollution helps this either). Whilst driving through the capital it is difficult to comprehend the sheer size of it; reflective skyscrapers tower over vast motorways lined with colourful taxis, beeping tuk-tuks, dangerously volatile mopeds and trucks with impatient drivers. Amidst this chaos the sky train hustles overhead, an extensive form of transport which has been running in Bangkok for a while now. The Chao Phraya river takes pride of place in the centre of this madness, and runs alongside the Royal Palace and the Temple of Dawn on the other side, an outstanding feat of illustrious architecture, whose presence only highlights the country’s unsettlingly imbalanced distribution of wealth, when compared to the shanty-town river huts dotted not too far beside it.

    Airplane Selfie
    Airplane Selfie

    Being a pedestrian here is just as bewildering. This city can be summed up as noise and people. When they say twenty-four hour, they mean it never sleeps; the buzz of mopeds, the unbearable heat and the general feeling of constant hectic energy never stops. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

    For a bit of tranquil shelter (to keep a sane mind in this exciting disarray of a capital), we always stay at The Honey Hotel, its slogan ‘a place small enough to call home’, which is perfectly fitting. My Dad has been going there for 35 years now, first travelling alone, then with my mum, and now as a family; all the while the staff have remained the same, the reception just as welcoming, and the food just as authentic and delicious. Starting and ending our trip here has become somewhat of a tradition; there aren’t a lot of places where you can have a cocktail and Pad Thai for just over 3 quid, by a pool, in the hub of this city. I wouldn’t know Bangkok without it.

  • ‘Nit Noi’

    ‘Nit Noi’

    Two little utterances that have brought me more shame than anything else in my twenty two years.  The amount of times I have used this phrase is beyond the point of embarrassing, and every time I do, a half smile and awkward silence proceeds, whilst memories flood back of missed opportunities and that familiar feeling of helplessness.

    Nit Noi is Thai for ‘a little bit’ and is basically my go-to response/#1 fave Thai catchphrase when asked if I speak the language. After every visit to my mother’s motherland the answer is always the same. Which makes the next question even better; ‘What do you study?’ ‘Languages’ *Cue perplexed expression*

    Yeah, I know right, just not one of my own languages.

    I’ve listed my excuses; in fact, I’ve probably spent more time defending myself as to why I can’t speak it instead of actually attempting to.

    1. I am studying Spanish AND Italian; this is enough to cope with especially for someone as scatty as myself – can you imagine how difficult it is to study a Spanish module in an Italian university when the professor himself switches language without warning? Did I mention he definitely spoke Castilian with a Dolmio accent?
    2. Despite Mum’s best efforts to speak only Thai to me at home, it is easier (not to mention much quicker) for me to respond in English, and most of the time I am not at home
    3. There is a different alphabet – what should I do, learn to read/write or speak first?
    4. I’ve got plenty of time to learn it

    Truth is, I wasn’t worried about keeping it up before, and now I find myself in the same embarrassing position as always, phrasebook in hand, playing a game of charades, trying to ask Khun Yai (grandma) what’s for breakfast. Awks?  Not even. It’s just plain upsetting.  Why?

    Time. Time is such bastard isn’t it. Scuze my French, or any other language I can’t speak LOL. My Erasmus year has been so eye opening and, frankly, I think I would be extremely lucky if I ever get the chance to experience something like it again. It just goes by SO quickly. And this is coming from someone who managed to stay abroad for more than a year. Everyone said, ‘Don’t forget to update your blog, I’ll be looking to see what you’re up to’

    …

    Well. It’s me isn’t it.

    If you don’t know me, and on the off chance you had stumbled upon my just-about-there blog, you’d have gotten the impression I’d run away with a Spaniard or, more likely, fell in the sea after one too many Sangrias, before I even got the chance to fly to Italy. ITALY. Yes, I did make it there, and, as part of my new found motivation to get up off my pizza-based arse (THE FOOD THERE BY THE WAY WAS INCRED, I WILL BE POSTING PICS) and do something productive, I am starting up this writing business again, so now memories of Granada and Modena will be posted on the regular. That’s a promise I’m more than reluctant to break.

    I’ve scolded myself enough times for being predictable Sam – start things and don’t finish them; with Thai (you know, I once spoke it fluently way back when, and even held a Hua Hin dialect), with Spanish/Italian (it has taken me bloody long enough to be able to speak beyond-ordering-pastries-from-bakery level) and with blogging, which is evident from the number/lack of posts you see before you.

    However, I’d like to cut myself and others in my predicament a little slack. I am not lazy. Sure I can be at times, but that is not my general attitude. In fact, I am far from it. My Dad says I have a problem.

    “You always try to fit two pints into a one pint pot.”

    It’s true, I try to do everything at once, and sometimes, a lot of the time, it’s just not possible, but why not try? From my point of view, it’s not a bad mindset to have, in fact, I prefer to believe that ‘life is what happens while you are busy making other plans’. Too damn straight. Rather I was living, embracing all the opportunities thrown my way on my year abroad, than waste the precious time I had to record snippets of my experiences, which might not have been otherwise.

    As for the case of my dire pidgin Thai, I’m working on it. It’s nowhere near good enough now, but one thing I’ve learnt from Erasmus, and something that’s shocked me in more ways than one, is the realisation of priorities.  Embarrassed as I am to claim Thai nationality without acquisition of its language, I am studying for a degree in Spanish and Italian, which is what needs to be (well) worked on first.  This doesn´t mean I can’t take a little time out to study Thai on the side, and by no means will it stop me from miming and blurting out random words across the breakfast table to bewildered relatives.

    Going Back To Our Roots
    Going Back To Our Roots

    In terms of writing, I owe it to the memories made on my year abroad **sorry for mushy ERASMUS YAHR WAS SUCH AN ENRICHING EXPERIENCE YAR talk** to document them as best I can. However, I will not apologise for using the time the way I did – the friends I made are those I will keep for life, time I spent with these individuals in unfamiliar locations proved invaluable to life learning, oh and on top of that, my language improved YAY! I didn’t record these moments as much then because I was too busy living them, but at least I can do that now.

    Dad is right. There is not enough time to do everything, but if you try and make the very most out of what time you have, then I don’t think that’s such bad shout.